What is tantric massage guide
Last Updated on November 12, 2023

What Is Tantric Massage?

Tantric massage is a unique, whole-body experience. Through a combination of touch, energy channeling, and breathing, a sensuous tantric massage can bring you to new levels of ecstasy and spirituality. Although everyone’s tantra goals are different, many people use it to open their minds – and bodies – to pleasure.

Learning tantric massage is a lot easier than you think.

In this guide, you’ll learn more about the basics of tantric massage, what to expect, and how to give (and receive) a tantric massage.

9 Tips On How To Prepare For Tantric Touch Massage

Before you can dive deep into the world of sexual healing massage, there are a few things you need to take care of first. In fact, prep work is half the work – if you want to maximize the spiritual and sexual benefits of tantra massage, check out these 9 tips.

Read Up On Tantra Massage

First things first!

You won’t know how to give a tantric massage if you don’t know the answers to fundamental questions like, “What is tantric massage?”, “What does tantra massage feel like?”, and “What are the goals of tantric sex practices?”

Girl reading a book about tantric massage

Block Off A Time

Schedule a massage session when you have nothing else to do. You want to be both physically and mentally present for the experience, so make sure that you allot enough time to explore it fully.

Don’t schedule anything important after so you can bask in the glow and process what you just went through.

Get To Know Your Tantra Massage Therapist

Whether it’s a partner or a professional tantric masseuse, the more you know your tantra partner, the more fulfilling your experience will be.

Therapists with the Tantric Massage Association will often start your session with a consultation so that both you and your therapist are on the same page.

Be Clear About Your Personal Boundaries

Respect and trust are the foundations of tantra. To fully let go and enjoy a tantric massage, you need to feel safe.

Communicate any mental or physical limits (for example, no genital stimulation) in advance.

Enter Into A Free, Receptive State Of Mind

Open your heart and mind to what you are about to experience.

You will be feeling a lot of new sensations and learning things about yourself – don’t resist this, even if the sudden self-awareness and pleasure make you feel uncomfortable at first!

Be prepared to accept and go with the flow.

Girl on the horse in summer

Create A Tantra Massage-Ready Space

Setting the physical space is almost as important as setting up your mental space.

Prepare a comfortable spot (with or without a massage bed, a tantra couch or a sex bean bag), dim the lights, and maybe even add scented candles. Place tantra massage oil (and anything else you might need) within arm’s reach so that you don’t have to leave the session.

Keep Conventional Sex Off The Table

Orgasm and physical pleasure are nice side benefits of tantric massages, but they’re not the goal. You can incorporate some genital massaging, but make sure to focus on other non-sexual parts of the body as well.

Take A Shower

Many professional therapists will ask you to take a shower before your massage for hygienic purposes.

But even when you’re practicing with an intimate partner, bathing beforehand acts as a “signal” to your body and mind to get ready for what’s ahead.

How To Do Tantric Massage With Your Partner: 11 Tantric Body Massage Techniques

Now that you know more about tantra, it’s time to learn how to tantric massage in a way that’s fulfilling for everyone involved. However, we won’t just give you specific tantric massage instructions; tantric massage is a very personal experience, so we want you to trust your instincts and do what feels right.

Instead, here are several tricks and techniques to guide you during your tantra sex practice.

Tantric massage accesories

Open With A Ritual

If you plan on practicing tantra more in the future, it helps to have an “opening ritual” to put you both in the right mindset.

It can be anything you want – breathing exercises, mindful touching, saying mantras, etc. – as long as you do it with intention.

Focus On The Feeling

Staying present means feeling everything, and not zoning out or overthinking or allowing the bliss to take over. Keep your attention on the sensations and touch.

Take this moment to live in your body, not in your head. Surrendering will help you have a more powerful, transcendental experience.

Activate Your Sexual Energy

Tantra is all about activating, harnessing, and freeing your energy. Know what you want, set an intention, and channel your energy towards achieving that.

Really feel the energy moving throughout your body, and try to direct it to places that need that extra bit of stimulation and attention.

Here you can get to know more about sexual transmutation.

Give & Receive Feedback

If you’re the one on the receiving end, let your partner know when you’re enjoying their touch. Sound it out – not only does it encourage your partner, but it might also bring you further into your sexual energy.

If you’re the one giving, pay attention to any explicit feedback and subtle body language. Really focus on their needs without demanding anything in return.

Men and Women talking

Play With The Senses

Here’s an easy tantra massage technique: stimulate the whole body through the different senses.

Use a blindfold to heighten their sense of hearing, smell, touch, and taste. You can play sexy music, light some scented candles, feed them delicious (but not heavy) food, and of course, ramp up the massage.

Harness Your Breathing

Breathing is an incredibly important tantric massage technique. In fact, it’s one of the most important elements in any tantra sex practice.

It’s just like meditation – breathe consciously and with intent, then use that to channel your energy to different parts of your body.

Soften Your Desire To Orgasm

Feeling pleasure is absolutely encouraged, and there’s nothing wrong if you actually do orgasm. But, again, climax should not be your goal.

If you feel it coming, you can ask your partner to slow down while “softening” your desire to explode.

Multitask With Your Hands

Stimulate as many parts of the body as you can. Massage their scalp, arms, legs, back, chest, feet, stomach, and butt. When you’re ready, you can move onto the genitals.

Touching both the clitoris/penis and the anus at the same time, for example, can bring your partner to new spiritual and sexual heights.

Human hands

Keep A Slow & Steady Pressure

Be gentle and take your time!

Tantric massage is not a race – there is no finish line, so you should both be enjoying the journey. This will help you get to know your partner in a way that’s more intimate than usual.

Know Your Boundaries – Then Push Them

Your boundaries tell you a lot about yourself, what you feel comfortable with, and what makes you hesitate. Some people have to learn how to give and others have to learn how to receive, even if it’s initially uncomfortable.

Allow this experience to help you explore the edges of your boundaries; you might just expand your pleasure.

Of course, there’s a huge difference between pushing a boundary and crossing it. You and your partner should never do anything without the other’s consent.

Carry Your New Spiritual, Sexual Energy Into Your Everyday Life

Some people feel the after-effects of an energy orgasm days after their massage. Carry that feeling of lightheartedness and mindfulness into your life.

Learn to listen to your body, make healthier and happier decisions, and be kinder to those around you.

What Happens During Tantric Massage Therapy?

Everyone’s tantric massage experience is different. If you go with a professional therapist, they will usually start out with a consultation to learn more about you. When the massage finally starts, they will work their way down and up your entire body.

Although some may include genital massaging, not all therapists do. So make sure you ask beforehand, especially if that’s something you don’t want to negotiate on.

For those starting out, you may enjoy the first level of pleasure – the physical sensation of being touched and sexually stimulated.

For more intermediate practitioners, there may be a mental level of being seen/heard by the person massaging you.

At its best, tantric massage leads to enlightened spirituality. You will be flooded with new thoughts, emotions, and body sensations.

Benefits Of Tantric Massage

The benefits of tantric massage encompass almost every aspect of your life and being. It’s equal parts physically, spiritually, emotionally, psychologically, and sexually uplifting.

Here are just some of the ways that a tantra massage can help you:

Tantric massage water lilies

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) About Tantric Massage Healing

Is tantric sex massage considered erotic massage?

Although the two may share some similarities, tantra is not the same as an erotic massage.

The goal of erotic massages is sexual satisfaction, while the goal of tantra is sexual and self-actualization. Although feel free to read more about tantra sex positions here.

Is tantra massage similar to physical/massage therapy?

There are many therapeutic and healing benefits to tantric massage, but strictly speaking, it is not a replacement for physical therapy.

Do you have to be an adult to try tantric massages?

There’s some debate about this in the tantra community.

On the one hand, tantra doesn’t always have to be sexual. On the other, it often is.

Many tantra massage parlors will accept clients who are aged 15 and up, but those who are 15-18 years old need a consent form signed by their parent or guardian.

Would you like to know more about tantra? Consider taking part in an online tantra course.

Is it okay to touch the person giving you a tantra massage?

When in doubt, ask.

Some therapists are open to gentle touch and requests for human connection, but it’s generally a no-no to initiate any kind of sexual contact with your therapist.

If you’re practicing with an intimate partner, clear it with them first! But you should really be focusing inward.

Is there tantric massage for men?

Tantric massage is great for all genders.

There are two subcategories of tantra massage: yoni (for people with vaginas) and lingam (for people with penises).


Tantric massage is a wonderful way to explore your body, sexuality, energy, spirituality, and connections to other people. But as with everything else, it takes time and practice to achieve its full benefits.

Don’t rush it – this is one case where the journey is just as much (if not more) fun than the destination.

If you are fussing over cleaning up afterwards, invest in a waterproof sex tarp! The perfect tool for absorbing cum or any oils that you may use during the tantric massage.