The Best Monkey Rocker in 2024
Also known as a sex glider, a monkey rocker is what you need when you’re trying to get over that jerk-off ex. They’re basically rocking chairs (if rocking chairs came with delicious dildos attached to them.)
Unlike those heavy-duty sex machines that are about as large as their price tag, these monkey rockers are powered by the star of the show: YOU! Yep, all you do is rock up and down or back and forth on them, and they’ll do for you what your ex never could.
And who do we have to thank for this sexy invention? A man called Dan Siechert, Monkey Rocker founder and self-proclaimed Chief Monkey (1)!
Now, I’m sure you’re itching to just hop on one of these bad boys right away. But before you do that, you must know what to look for in a good quality monkey rocker.
Luckily for you, I’ve reviewed some of the hottest sex gliders that will give you the best bang (heh) for your buck.
Read on to take a look at the rockers that will turn up the heat on your sex life!
HOT Picks!
Our Favourite
Pulse
Bring Dildo
& Let me rock you
Budget/Cheaper Option
Hot Seat
See you UP in clouds, honey!
*best for crazy …
Something A Bit Different
The Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine
Treat Your Cowgirl right.
Order it now!
How did we test and review the monkey rockers?
As much as I would have loved, there was no way I could test out all the gorgeous monkey rockers on this list on my own. I wouldn’t have been able to get anything else done, and I’d just end up super broke!
So, I had to enlist the help of a few willing (and very horny) Furnpeak members to lend their holes for the sake of a quality guide.
Once we had figured out the final list of rockers we wanted to test, we got to work. I do want to point out that a few rockers here aren’t exactly traditional monkey rockers as they offer a little extra oomph, so keep an eye out for those.
Each of us tested our designated dildo rockers as thoroughly as we could (no regrets, btw), especially in terms of design, effectiveness, uniqueness, and overall practicality. I hope you have as much fun reading about them as we did trying them out!
Best Dildo Rockers
Pulse Mount
If you’ve been looking for a rocking toy mount that is comfortable and easy to straddle, Liberator’s Pulse Rocking Sex Toy Mount is the real deal.
And if you get as lazy as I do about post-play cleanup, you can’t find an easier sex rocker to clean than this one!
This is a mount that’ll have you singing Shakira’s “Hips Don’t Lie”. How? The curved shape is designed to enhance all your thrusting.
Now, seriously, the best thing about this mount? It holds both vibrators and dildos and can hold two of these sex toys at once.
The ultimate bliss for double penetration pleasure! Also, you’ll want to know it feels amazing under your hips in a doggy position.
It’s petite, which means it’s easy to straddle. At 20” x 12” x 13”, you can sit on it comfortably.
It’s great on top of a bed or mattress topper. You definitely want to be on a surface where you won’t get carpet burns on your knees if you know what I mean!
The Pulse has a microfiber cover, which is common for Liberator sex furniture. The very practical and helpful thing about this is that it’s waterproof, meaning you can cover your mount in cum, lube, or even whipped cream!
It’s also easy to clean – you just stick the cover in your washing machine.
Are you a fan of dildo furniture? Then we have a guide for you!
Pros
- Enhances your hip movements for more sensation.
- Hands-free fun so you can touch yourself elsewhere too!
- Supports you in doggy position.
Cons
- Not designed for Wand vibrators.
- The shape doesn’t suit all body sizes (check measurements).
So, what are you waiting for?
Grab one of the highest-rated monkey rockers around by snapping up the Pulse Mount today!
Use the code: FURNPEAK for 10% off sitewide
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Fetish Fantasy Inflatable Hot Seat
Have you ever fantasized about rocking and grinding on a vibrating dong with all the control and comfort that a seat can offer?
The Fetish Fantasy Inflatable Hot Seat will have you drooling!
It’s simple; you fill up this seat so that it can fill you up *wink*.
With plenty of surface area and a weight capacity of 300 lbs, you can bounce your way to multiple mind-blowing orgasms.
Let this inflatable sex chair support your gorgeous body.
And, of course, let’s not forget about the thing that you’ll be bouncing on in the first place: a glorious six-inch dildo with a tip that can vibrate at various speeds.
Simply use the wired controller to adjust the speed, hold on to the handles for dear life, and get screwed the way you’ve always dreamt of.
If all of that wasn’t enough, let me drop another goodie: the dong is free of allergens, so it’s safe to use. Plus, feel free to flood this seat with zero concerns since it’s waterproof!
Pros
- Supports up to 300 lbs, so most plus-size people can rock away with zero concerns.
- The vibrating dildo offers multiple speeds, so you can adjust your grinding experience on the go using the controller.
- The waterproof design means you can flood this seat without worrying about damaging it!
Cons
- The vibrations aren’t super intense.
- It might not be a great fit for you if you want a dildo shorter or longer than six inches.
Feeling yourself getting wet just thinking about it?
I wouldn’t wait if I were you; make this inflatable seat yours right away!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Best Sex Gliders
Versatile Glider: Love Glider Sex Machine
If you’ve been looking for a monkey rocker that is versatile and customizable, you can’t go wrong with the mid-range budget Love Glider Sex Machine.
This sex rocker looks like a typical monkey chair for adults. As you straddle the machine, the dildo is perfectly placed for penetration.
The plush thigh rests make this a comfortable ride. Your movements control the thrust and depth of the dildo, giving you control of your orgasms.
This monkey rocker sex toy includes two attachments, a ribbed dildo, and a tapered anal probe.
It’s also compatible with most vac-u-lock dildos, so you can go wild with your cock selection, increasing your opportunities for pleasure.
Now, I don’t know about you, but I like blowing my back, not my wallet!
A dildo rocker is an incredibly sexy piece of furniture, but it’s always less risky to start with something in the low-to-mid budget range that does NOT compromise on the monkey rocker experience. This is where the Love Glider is a blessing from the sex rocker gods up above!
Pros
- Features padded thigh rests that let you rock with comfort and ease.
- Compatible with most vac-u-lock dildos, so you can attach your fave dong for a personal rocking experience.
- It doesn’t create a lot of noise, so you don’t have to worry about the kids wondering what’s up!
Cons
- It might be an expensive option for some users.
- It requires a lot of space.
Does a versatile love glider that won’t break the bank sound like what the doctor ordered?
You better saddle up and place an order for this bad boy, like, right now!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Dildo Rocking Chair: Cloud 9 F- Slider Ride-On
A rocking chair featuring a mouthwatering 7-inch long dong, a universal adapter for your favorite dildos, and a weight capacity of up to 400 lbs?
If that sounds like your idea of being on Cloud 9, you’ll absolutely love the Cloud 9 F-Slider Ride-On!
This sex rocker is all about giving you the power to customize your fucking experience.
Like all the other monkey rockers, this one is powered by your own rocking movement and thrusts. However, there are a few things that give this beast a serious edge.
For starters, you get a 7” realistic dildo right out of the box that can fill your holes in the best way possible. But that’s just ONE of the options you have.
Thanks to the handy Vac-U-Lock adapter and universal dildo adapter on this chair, you can stick any lubed-up dong you want. The knobs let you adjust how deeply you’d like to be fucked by your dildo of choice.
Once that has been done, all you have to do is ride like there’s no tomorrow! This chair isn’t like one of those mechanical sex machine chairs that feel unnatural and make a ruckus.
Pros
- Fucks you automatically without any major effort from your side; all you gotta do is thrust!
- The dildo attachment is interchangeable, so you can enjoy new experiences with the same chair.
- Extremely sturdy build, so you can ride it as long as you want without worrying about breaking it.
Cons
- Some users find that the thrusting action isn’t as hard and fast as they would have liked!
This one rocks to the rhythm of your deepest riding fantasies; get yours ASAP!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
LoveBotz Deluxe Bangin Bench
Looking for a sturdy banging bench that can be used with a partner for queening or with the included sex machine for mindblowing solo sessions?
Well, does the idea of getting fucked at a rate of up to 195 thrusts per minute sound like something you’d be down for?
You’ll want to snap up the LoveBotz Deluxe Bangin Bench with Sex Machine!
I don’t even know where to start with all the incredibly satisfying ways in which you can use this sex chair.
It starts off as a regular steel frame bench that you can use for something fun like queening.
You can upgrade it by snapping on a couple of padded cushions that can host your fine ass in the most comfy way.
But the best part is the detachable sex machine that you can mount on the base of this bad boy for an intensely fulfilling fuckfest.
Adjust the angle and height to your liking, use the wired controller to control the thrusting speed, and see how long you can last (spoiler: not very long)!
While you get a realistic 6.75” long dildo with this bench, the sex machine’s Vac-U-Lock attachment lets you stick any of your darling Vac-U-Lock dildo attachments for a personalized experience.
If you’re a plus-sized person, the Bangin Bench might not feel particularly sturdy, so that’s one thing to keep in mind before you purchase this rocker. But, if you weigh less than 220 lbs and would love to experience deep penetration for solo and couple play, this is a solid one.
Pros
- Features padded cushions that you can easily snap on for a comfortable riding experience.
- Includes a sex machine that can be used either on its own or with the chair for thrusting action of up to 195 thrusts per minute.
- Vac-U-Lock compatible, so you can include your favorite Vac-U-Lock dildo attachments for customized banging.
Cons
- It is not sturdy enough for plus-sized people.
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Something A Bit Different: The Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine
Clitoral Rawhide? G-spot Wild West? These aren’t porn titles; they are two sensations you can experience with the Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine.
Does a chair offering deep vibrations for your clit and an oh-so-satisfying massage for your G-spot sound like the stuff of your dreams?
This is one product you can’t miss out on!
This sleek chair is a vibrating straddle sex machine that will make you forget about all the meh sex you’ve ever had.
With a padded saddle seat made of wipe-clean vegan leather, you won’t need a ton of convincing to hop on and unleash your cowgirl fantasies.
What makes this sex chair such a gem are the two silicone attachments it comes with one for clitoral stimulation that you can grind against and the other for a G-spot massage that can fill you up nicely and right.
Remember that time you had to groan in frustration when yet another lover couldn’t find your clit?
Well, with this chair as your fuckbuddy, you don’t have to worry about that one bit. If anything, with the six different vibration settings on offer, as well as the 360 swivel rotation from the G-spot attachment, you seriously won’t feel like going back to regular sex!
And I haven’t even touched on my personal favorite thing about this machine – the control options!
You can either use the wired LED controller to adjust the thrills you get or let your partner take charge of your experience through the smartphone app from up to 30 feet away.
Think of all the naughty stuff you can get up to…
If this sounds like your thing, I also recommend you read the review of the Cowgirl Unicorn Sex Machine.
Pros
- Offers both clitoral and G-spot stimulation, so you get to hit your pleasure spots just the way you like.
- Supports up to 400 lbs of body weight, so most plus-sized people can easily rock away on it.
- Wired and smartphone app control lets you or your partner easily adjust the vibration and rotation speeds on the go.
Cons
- This is an expensive machine, so not the best option for budget-conscious individuals.
- It’s not a discreet one, so you’ll need to figure out where to hide it safely!
Are you ready to grind and pound your way to the most explosive orgasms of your life?
Yeehaw with the Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine today!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Budget Option: Sex Position Enhancer Chair
Though I doubt you’d need to since this chair doesn’t exactly scream, “They use me for mindblowing sex!”
Fancy something that is easy to use, fairly discreet, and lets you fool around with all kinds of sex positions?
Bondage Boutique’s Sex Position Enhancer Chair is the answer you’re looking for (read more in my review).
Honestly, the name tells you all you need to know: it’s a no-nonsense sex stool that makes it easier for you to bounce and rock your way to mindblowing orgasms.
The strong and sturdy metal frame, combined with the FOUR layers of wide elastic straps, offer support for whoever’s on top.
It makes for a chair that lets you get screwed without screwing your back and knees!
Setting it up is easy, especially with a partner. You can also dismantle it as well to make it easier to hide under your bed.
Though I doubt you’d need to since this chair doesn’t exactly scream, “They use me for mindblowing sex!” And with a maximum weight capacity of up to 330 lbs, most people will find that they can grind over their partner’s mouth/penis or a sex toy without worrying about embarrassing themselves.
Pros
- Easy to set up and dismantle, so you can spend more time playing and less time working!
- Maximum weight capacity of up to 330 lbs means most plus-sized people can comfortably ride on this chair.
- Sturdy metal frame lets you go as wild and rough as you’d like without worrying about breaking anything.
Cons
- Doesn’t have a handle for the added support that some users might require.
Does an affordable and easy-to-use sex position enhancer have got you thinking?
Stop that train of thought right there and place an order right now!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
You may also need this…
Thrusting Dildo: Lovense Gravity
It vibrates, it can stick to any flat surface, and it can fuck you at a blistering pace of 140 thrusts per minute.
If that got you sitting up straighter, you might want to know a thing or two about the Lovense Gravity App Controlled Thrusting and Vibrating Dildo!
While this toy is not a monkey rocker in any sense, it can rock your world in pretty much the same way (Find out more in our beginner’s dildo guide).
As long as you can find a smooth and flat surface to stick the Gravity’s suction cup to, you can indulge in some wet and wild, hands-free fun.
Wait, did I say “wet”? Why yes, I did! You can use this waterproof dong in the shower to transform your bath time into much-needed playtime.
The vibrating and thrusting abilities of this 10-inch long fuckbuddy (5” insertable) weren’t enough?
You can use the Lovense app to adjust its speed and intensity even while you’re getting drilled. And don’t worry if you have insane stamina, because this bad boy can keep going for FOUR hours on a single charge.
Pros
- Offers both vibrations and thrusts, thereby letting you reach your peak sooner than you ever thought possible.
- Waterproof design lets you play with it in the shower for wet and wild fun.
- Features a battery life of four hours, so you can indulge in a true self-love marathon!
Cons
- You’ll need a very specific surface - smooth and flat - to get the best out of this toy.
Ready to get your holes filled in all kinds of moan-inducing ways?
Grab the Lovense Gravity, and thank me later!
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Things to consider when choosing a Monkey Rocker
Rocking sex chairs are not cheap; they’re a pretty expensive piece of sex furniture.
Don’t let that put you off, however, because any rocking dildo sex chair owner will tell you they’re worth every cent.
A rocking dildo chair will cost quite a bit, so you’ll need to make sure you stick to budget.
Conclusion
Whether you call it a sex glider or a monkey rocker, a dildo rocker is something that will definitely add that much-needed layer of excitement to your sex life.
If you’re single, you have yourself a handy tool that lets you get yourself off as if you’re having actual sex, except this one will last way longer! And if you have one or more partners, it’s a neat way to spice things up.
Just spend some time thinking about factors like comfort, dildo choice, and budget, and you’re sure to find a rocker that will literally rock your world!
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a dildo rocker?
A dildo rocker is a self-powered sex machine in which you control the dildo’s thrusting motion by rocking back and forth.
How to use an adult rocker?
Unlike some intimidating sex products, monkey rockers are pretty straight forward to use.
All you need to do is straddle the gap and rock, and the pleasure glider will do the rest. Your rocking motion will control the monkey chair’s dildo action to fill you up just how you like it.
You’ll be in charge of how deep and how hard the dildo moves and the momentum of the chair will simply add to your pleasure.
Do I need a monkey rocker?
You need a monkey rocker if you want to spice up your solo or partner play (with some automatic thrusting action without the noise or the bulkiness that comes with traditional, mechanical sex machines.)
If you’d like to know more options, see other sex chair reviews.
Are monkey rockers worth the money?
Yes, monkey rockers are worth the money because they will let you experience orgasms like never before. You can use them alone or with a partner.
You can also control the penetration to be as deep or as fast as you desire. And unlike the expensive sex machines that create a ruckus and need a power cord, these rockers need nothing but the rhythm of your back-and-forth movements!
Can I make my own rocking chair for sex?
Yes, you can absolutely make your own rocking chair for sex.
If you’re good with your hands, there are plenty of plans available online (like the one here), so you can build a customized rocking chair-style sex machine to your unique specifications.
Liberator Pulse
Prices are always changing. To see the current deal to spice things up, check out the shop we recommend!
Pros
- Waterproof and easy to clean.
- Portable.
- Holds both vibrators and dildos.
Cons
- Might not be suitable for all body types.
Reference:
- https://www.monkeyrocker.com/home2020.html
